perchance to dream
ay, there's the rub.
I will suffer from some form of sleep disorder, I was once told, for the rest of my life.
as a child, I was a somnambulist. sleepwalker for the layman (there's a cruel word!). my folks heard me screaming one night outside in a rainstorm. they would later get in the habit of placing objects in my way at night, so I would go back to bed.
sleepwalking pretty much ended with the advent of sex, aged 15.
(if you are my daughter, do not follow in daddy's footsteps)
around the age of 18 I began having fits of normal sleep, with most evenings averaging 3-6 hours.
trouble going to sleep followed by fitful sleep, ending with early risings.
loads of fun. if you like bags under the eyes in your 20's not due to over indulgence.
also fun if you like constantly experiencing mild hallucinations out of the corner of your eyes, or occasional physical collapse for 20 hours straight once a month or so.
ah, insomnia! t.v. is the enemy, books merely display dancing black squiggles, conversations degenerate into verbal sludge and dream-time references. Ok if your partner enjoys Kurt scatters at 4 a.m. creative forays seem great in the sleepless zone, but the next morning shows those wonderful notes you took to be recycled 'Dennis the menace' strips on valium.
the only positive side was when my girl was an infant, and my 'training' allowed me to stay up with the cholic, allowing the mother unit to get the sleep for the two of us.
(this sort of 'I can stay awake' power comes in handy at busy times)
another amusing bit-my girl loves this-is that when in the worst near bardo state, I will bark a single syllable 'HA' at anything that catches my fancy. sometimes even for the hallucinations (they do bark back).
at any job I've held, the abrupt 'nod-off' could always be available for employee fun. or gossip about my 'problem', which would lead to sincere heart to heart talks about 12 step programs.
people would rather believe that you have a 'problem' than recognize a sleep disorder. it confuses them, and makes their worldview get all wonky: I mean, what possible evolutionary advantage is there to constant low level dementia?
except, perhaps to insure easy prey for larger animals. remind me to avoid jungles. I look over my shoulders constantly. loud and sudden noises induce screams from me.
well, welcome to my world. sleeplessness also brings chronic paranoia.
I wonder if any studies relating mental disorders linked to 'sleep me not' exist?
after a wonderfully busy last weekend (none of your business yet) I realized that from Friday morning until Tuesday I had gotten 14 hours of sleep. the five days were not typical of my sleeplessness, this loss of sleep was due to having much to do, a lot on my mind, and a happy reunion with an old friend. plus 'DJing' and air travel.
sleep was a distraction. as I said, a lot on my mind.
come Wednesday, I was barking at every little thing. and was happy.
now if I could just turn on the sleep engine, before I nod off again...
I will suffer from some form of sleep disorder, I was once told, for the rest of my life.
as a child, I was a somnambulist. sleepwalker for the layman (there's a cruel word!). my folks heard me screaming one night outside in a rainstorm. they would later get in the habit of placing objects in my way at night, so I would go back to bed.
sleepwalking pretty much ended with the advent of sex, aged 15.
(if you are my daughter, do not follow in daddy's footsteps)
around the age of 18 I began having fits of normal sleep, with most evenings averaging 3-6 hours.
trouble going to sleep followed by fitful sleep, ending with early risings.
loads of fun. if you like bags under the eyes in your 20's not due to over indulgence.
also fun if you like constantly experiencing mild hallucinations out of the corner of your eyes, or occasional physical collapse for 20 hours straight once a month or so.
ah, insomnia! t.v. is the enemy, books merely display dancing black squiggles, conversations degenerate into verbal sludge and dream-time references. Ok if your partner enjoys Kurt scatters at 4 a.m. creative forays seem great in the sleepless zone, but the next morning shows those wonderful notes you took to be recycled 'Dennis the menace' strips on valium.
the only positive side was when my girl was an infant, and my 'training' allowed me to stay up with the cholic, allowing the mother unit to get the sleep for the two of us.
(this sort of 'I can stay awake' power comes in handy at busy times)
another amusing bit-my girl loves this-is that when in the worst near bardo state, I will bark a single syllable 'HA' at anything that catches my fancy. sometimes even for the hallucinations (they do bark back).
at any job I've held, the abrupt 'nod-off' could always be available for employee fun. or gossip about my 'problem', which would lead to sincere heart to heart talks about 12 step programs.
people would rather believe that you have a 'problem' than recognize a sleep disorder. it confuses them, and makes their worldview get all wonky: I mean, what possible evolutionary advantage is there to constant low level dementia?
except, perhaps to insure easy prey for larger animals. remind me to avoid jungles. I look over my shoulders constantly. loud and sudden noises induce screams from me.
well, welcome to my world. sleeplessness also brings chronic paranoia.
I wonder if any studies relating mental disorders linked to 'sleep me not' exist?
after a wonderfully busy last weekend (none of your business yet) I realized that from Friday morning until Tuesday I had gotten 14 hours of sleep. the five days were not typical of my sleeplessness, this loss of sleep was due to having much to do, a lot on my mind, and a happy reunion with an old friend. plus 'DJing' and air travel.
sleep was a distraction. as I said, a lot on my mind.
come Wednesday, I was barking at every little thing. and was happy.
now if I could just turn on the sleep engine, before I nod off again...
posted by mo figuls at 2:30 PM
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